Sometimes I forget how good it feels to sit by a fire. To smell the smoke and breathe fresh air. Fire is a calling to our human ancestry. A major turning point in our evolution when we began digesting our food before ingesting it, to save energy for other things. Some people believe that this is what allowed energy to go to our brains, and is what fueled the increase in our brain size. Imagine that. Fire is what allows us to wonder about the universe, where we come from, and ponder about why we are here. Thank you 🙏🏼 🔥
#psychotherapistsoftoronto #psychotherapiststoronto #psychotherapistoftoronto #torontopsychotherapy #psychology #selfhealers #holistichealth #mindbodyhealing #mindbodyhealth #spirituality #fire #thefourelements
So often we try to get rid of the parts of us that are engaging in negative coping. “JUST STOP IT!” we say. “Get away!”
The psychology of this is like a finger trap, the harder and quicker we pull away, the tighter grip these parts have. Think of these parts like children, if we ignore them they will scream louder until we pay attention!
Another way to think of it is like a physical injury. It usually isn’t the original injury that is the long standing issue, but rather the protective muscles that seize up around the injury that become the chronic pain. If we want our chronic pain to lessen, we have to learn how to begin to accept the original loss. -How were we fundamentally changed by this event?
-What are my protective parts/muscles needing?
Protective parts/muscles usually need some support! They are carrying much of the load. As we strengthen other muscles, and we develop new healthy coping we start to unburden the protection, and lessen the pain.
When we ease towards the other finger in the trap, the chronic pain that we are avoiding, we create the space to slowly ease out of that tight-gripped pattern. When we engage in the daily physio required to build other muscles, or the daily exercises that support and accept the protective parts and the original loss or injury, there is a tension release.
Point is. Stop trying to get rid of these beautiful parts of you! Honour how they’ve protected you, or how they have led you to seek healthier ways of coping that will enrich your life in ways you never imagined.
Thanks @lyndsaybraman
#partswork #internalfamilysystems #embodiment #mindbodytherapy #mindbodyhealthcare #mindbody #negativecoping #addiction #addictioncycle #addictionrecovery #psychotherapytoronto #torontopsychotherapy #torontopsychotherapist #torontohealthylifestyle #torontotherapy #torontohealthcare
Peace comes in many forms. Today it is kitty noses and Swiss chard.
#torontogarden #torontopsychotherapists #torontopsychotherapist #torontopsychology #torontomentalhealth #mentalhealthto #selfhealers
You’ll find me providing in-person psychotherapy at Aurum Medicine & Wellness Centre on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
We support mental and physical health through psychotherapy, acupuncture, massage, and naturopathy.
Come visit our practitioners to experience holistic healthcare that will support you to make mind and body connections and experience the resulting health benefits.
#torontopsychotherapy #torontopsychotherapist #torontomentalhealth #torontopsychology #torontopsychologist #torontotherapy #torontonaturopathy #torontonaturopath #torontocounselling #torontomassage #torontohealth #torontohealing #mindbodytherapy #mindbodyconnection #mindbodymedicine #torontoantiracism #selfhealerscommuity #holisticpsychology #holistichealth #torontoholistichealth #torontohealer
Making my balcony an oasis this summer was a pandemic priority! Nature is healing. And this garden tower is one step toward more sustainable living! Right now my worms are chomping on my organic waste and also chewing up all the shredded paper from my session notes! Just think, stories of pain and triumph are becoming the nourishment for life!!!! There is always a purpose to our pain and our existence!
#lifecycle #gardening #gardentower2 #torontopsychotherapist #psychotherapy #ecotherapy #natureishealing
In the TV show Kidding, Jim Carrey plays Jeff Pickles - a “Mr. Roger’s-esque” television star. Jeff Pickles shares his incredible message in song, teaching children and reminding adults about the deepest parts of ourselves. Those parts of us that exist outside of time and space, distinct from our mortal bodies, he is singing about the soul. That part of us that is guided by love and intuition. That part that reminds us why we are here, and what we are here for: to learn and grow.
As we learn and grow, we change, which means we have to say goodbye to certain parts of ourselves. The “outside parts.” And that is painful. But pain is a necessary part of life. It is our relationship to pain that can create suffering. Some of our greatest suffering can come from not wanting to let go of an “outside part,” or forgetting that we have an “inside part” to guide us.
Jeff Pickles reminds us that real listening and authentic connection happens when we see past the superfluous self and into each other’s souls.
Watch Jim Carrey in his stunning performance… and TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!
#kiddingtvseries #kiddingtvshow #kidding #jimcarrey #mrrogers #parenting #thechildrenoftheworld #listening #activelistening #torontopsychotherapists #psychotherapy #psychotherapymemes #socialwork #parentchildrelationships #parentchildrelationshipsmatter
When kids stop going to school, it’s not because they’re “lazy.”
Our baseline survival needs must be met before we can feel safe, before we can experience love and belonging before we feel grounded and worthy enough to attend school.
Parents are responsible for meeting their kids’ needs, and we are all responsible for meeting our inner children’s needs. In fact, we can only effectively parent once we have met our own inner children’s needs first. (That old “put the oxygen mask on you first, before your child.”)
Meeting our own needs looks like understanding the hurt, fear, anger, and shame we experienced in our childhood narrative (discover where it comes from, find the root) and then develop strategies to transform:
Hurt->playfulness
Fear->curiosity
Anger->energy
Shame->comfort
When we develop strategies to meet our inner child needs - we begin to repair the attachment we have with ourselves. We begin to create emotional safety and a sense of belonging at home and in the body. We become models for our children and teach them that they are deserving of safety, self-regulation, self-love.
Self-actualisation? I don’t know if we ever get there and if we do I worry we stop trying, which means we stop practicing! And when we stop practicing we stop growing...
#maslowshierarchyofneeds #maslows #psychotherapytoronto #torontopsychotherapist #mentalhealth #mentalhealthtoronto #psychotherapymemes #psychology #selfhelp #parentingtips #parenting #parentinghacks #selfempowerment
T bells and a little poem I wrote at the beginning of COVID:
Hey YOU! Get OUTSIDE! Don’t abide by those that lied! The green space, is still safe. Just be sure to cover your face! Wash your hands and get a tan. Avoid that which has been banned. Stay away from people obvi, this isn’t some hotel lobby! But don’t forget this kernel of truth, step back into your inner youth. Healthy minds stave disease. So get outside and breathe the trees!
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#healthyreminder #mentalhealth #psychotherapy #staywell #stayactive #covid_19 #copingstrategies #healthybalance #psychotherapytoronto #embodimentpractice #covidisolation #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #selfhealers #spiritualhealing
Words from a dead funeral director... Nathaniel Fisher’s character is cast so well in HBO series Six Feet Under. The hardest to get to know, most peculiar, and humble he comes at just the right moment to give his remaining family the life advice they don’t want to hear, but the audience yearns for.
An epic show, one of the best series finales... it takes you on a journey of diving into the dynamics of a family who face death on a daily basis beginning with the loss of their father and husband.
The show portrays the effects of attachment trauma and the challenges of navigating codependency, emotion dysregulation, and the push pull dynamics of borderline/narcissistic. You will love and hate every character at different points in the seasons, and if you’re paying attention to this process, you will learn about these push-pull parts of you too!
SFU invites complex conversations about race, culture, sex, and faith. Way ahead of its time it is still worth a watch if you haven’t had the chance... Six Feet Under will always be my favourite tv show of all time!!!
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#copingstrategies #sixfeetunderhbo #hbo #sixfeetunder #besttvshow #besttvshowever #trendingmentalhealth #psychotherapytoronto #embodimentpractice #covidisolation #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing
Dan Siegel’s healthy mind platter is the perfect way to check-in with yourself about what you NEED. One thing I love about this tool is the distinction between down-time, time-in, and sleep-time. Not only do we need to rest, but we need active reflection and passive reflection. It’s actually time-in and down-time during the day that will improve our sleep-time, because instead of forcing yourself to process everything at night, you’re taking that conscious and unconscious reflection time during the day. Helps keep the demons at bay! Therapy and your guilty pleasure are ways to take conscious and unconscious reflection time.
In order to rest or sleep we also need activities to move energy through our bodies. With COVID we are in a constant state of connecting time and play time debt... These activities stimulate the vagus nerve through our “social engagement system,” which helps to slow down our heart rate and turn off the stress response. Essentially, in COVID isolation we are more stressed. Unfortunately the only option for folks is to lean into the exercise and physical activity... And sometimes it is friggin tough to do that!
#copingstrategies #healthybalance #restandrecover #dansiegel #brainstorm #downtime #sleeptime #timein #psychotherapytoronto #embodimentpractice #covidisolation #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing
Some dogs will change your life forever.
WonderPup or “WP” came with the Airbnb “cottage” up north from early summer last year. It felt like the late TroyBoy, my yellow dog who died four years prior, was visiting for the week. “WP” is more syllables than “WonderPup,” but after a week with this guy - calling out “WP” felt like the cutest thing in the world. This beautiful stallion chased away the mean geese. He protected the land for the people and lived a proper nature life full of sticks and swimming. (Something TroyBoy never got enough of in his urban setting.)
Connecting to animals is a profound way to connect to nature and ourselves. Tuning in to play, love, companionship and honouring the “animal” parts of our brain can have a strong grounding impact. Living through a pandemic in a big city - how do we push ourselves to get outside? See the dogs in the park? It is good for our mental health to experience the small breaths of cold air and the friendly, furry, cuddly, snuggly faces! (Good thing dogs don’t have to wear masks!!) Miss you WP!!
#WONDERPUP #YellowLab #dogs #forestbathing #natureishealing #doggos #torontopsychotherapy #torontopsychotherapist #pettherapy #embodimentpractice #thebodykeepsthescore #dogsofinstagram #natureistherapy #spiritualjourney #spiritualguidance #spiritdog #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters
If there’s a spirituality I adhere to, it is this… Caroline Myss describes so well what it is like to begin to listen to the divine in you. So often we can only hear the voices at the surface, from those protective parts of us. And when our entire lives are guided by inner children who are trying to prevent shame, abandonment, vulnerability, or betrayal, we risk maturing and growing into the responsible, accountable adults that we want to be.
Instead of trying to get rid of or abandon these child-like parts (because that only makes us more disconnected from ourselves)- can we tune in closer and listen to what they want for us? Can we have compassion for how they kept us safe at a time, and they were essential then… and can we now give them a new purpose? Sometimes it is really, really hard to listen to these voices because of the pain they bring up, but we can never heal what stays buried or hidden from consciousness. And underneath that pain is the inner guide you are looking for… This is the healing that brings us to wholeness.
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#carolinemyss #carolinemyssquotes #psychotherapy #therapy #psychotherapytoronto #psychotherapyquotes #therapyquotes #selflove #healingjourney #attachment #attachmenttrauma #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing
Anxiety is just a fancy word for fear. I love cycles because they remind us what energy we’re putting in to our patterns and how we can change that. At every arrow is an alternative. Fear—>Face fear—>Short-term pain—>Long-term fear reduction. Facing fears looks and feels like doing that very awkward, uncomfortable but SAFE thing that you have generally avoided in life (notice how it’s happened several times? That means it’s a pattern or a cycle).
#BOOM #YOUCANDOIT #juststartwithasmallfear #choosetheshorttermpain
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#anxietyrelief #anxietyawareness #anxietysupport #psychotherapytoronto #therapistsofinstagram #therapymemes #anxietyrecovery #selflove #healingjourney #attachment #attachmenttrauma #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing
Therapy is not a last resort! It can be most effective when it’s used as a preventative measure or routine check... you wouldn’t wait before your car breaks down to get an oil change, would you?!
If you have benefits or the income to support it, why not?
@meganeshook
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#youareimportant #psychotherapy #therapy #psychotherapytoronto #psychotherapyquotes #therapyquotes #healingwithlove #selflove #healingjourney #attachment #attachmenttrauma #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing
Running includes three out of the six best doctors (exercise, air, and sun)! But running can also come with its gnarly injuries. Last summer I developed a permanent hip injury from running and little did I know it was totally preventable... you just have to warm up and start slow.
Here are interval programs to help you get back to, or start running...
I can’t recommend this evidence-based physio-informed program more! Interval program II has gotten me back on my feet... and yes run/walk-ing is annoying, but injury prevention is essential! Plus it’s still pretty epic exercise!
Hit up @florence.bowen for incredible movement classes that will strengthen all the right muscles for running 💗🏃🏽♀️
(Check www.therunningclinic.com to find out which interval program is for you)
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#healthylifestyle #psychotherapy #therapy #psychotherapytoronto #psychotherapyquotes #healingwithlove #selflove #healingjourney #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #howtobehuman #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing #breathwork #runningismytherapy #runnersofinstagram #runningmotivation
Enjoying these last few moments of outdoor rinks. Going for a skate forces fresh cool air into my lungs. A reminder that I am alive NOW, and there’s something to that.
Part of why this happens is because cold stimulates the vagus nerve (10th cranial nerve), which helps activate the parasympathetic nervous system to help us recover from fight-or-flight. Moving from “survive” or “stress” mode to “thrive” mode can be a simple 5 minute deep breath of cold, ice cold drink, splashing the face with cold water, or jumping in that cold shower.
When we are in stress mode we are in the past or the future... The cold helps to do a physiological reset and bring us to the present! And then the wonder can begin...
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#healthylifestyle #psychotherapy #therapy #psychotherapytoronto #psychotherapyquotes #healingwithlove #selflove #healingjourney #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #howtobehuman #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing #breathwork
A supervisor shared this quote recently. It is an important reminder that it is easy to blame, it is easy to point the finger, it is easy to say “do better.” It is harder to soften into “I don’t know” and let go. It is harder to acknowledge that you are always halfway there at best and there is always more to learn. It is harder to offer yourself the compassion that you are honestly doing your best, and so are those around you.
It is also easy to make excuses and avoid the inevitable pain that comes with growth and “doing better.” Our habits and our ways will always pull us toward the familiar routes. It is harder to be accountable. It is harder to hold the tension of compassion and responsibility-taking. This looks like - “I did my best” AND “I hurt you” “I will do better next time” ... and do it.
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Photo cred: https://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/maya-angelou-writer-and-poet-dies-at-age-86/2014/05/28/2948ef5e-c5da-11df-94e1-c5afa35a9e59_story.html
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#inspirationalquotes
#mayaangelou #torontopsychotherapy #torontopsychotherapist #embodiment #therapyquotes #healingwithlove #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #selflove #selfhelp #traumarecovery #familytherapy #useyourvoice #useyourprivilege #whiteprivilege #indigenouslivesmatter #blacklivesmatter #bipocmentalhealth #intergenerationaltrauma #mentalhealthmatters #whitefragility #whitesilenceisviolence #relationshipquotes #traumahealing #howtobehuman #spiritualawakening #traumatherapy #spiritualjourney
Reminding you about the rare chance that you exist and why that is a miracle to celebrate 💚🙏🏼💜
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#psychotherapy #therapy #psychotherapytoronto #psychotherapyquotes #therapyquotes #healingwithlove #selflove #healingjourney #attachment #attachmenttrauma #anxiety #depression #emotionalhealth #embodiment #selfactualization #howtobehuman #relationshipgoals #emdr #trauma #spiritualjourney #traumarecovery #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #internalfamilysystems #partswork #familytherapy #familytherapist #mentalhealthmatters #spirtuality #spiritualhealing
